I feel like at times I get on mini tangets and over expose myself via blogging with overdosed sessions of 'where am I in life'.
How come I can't find a job...
What should I be doing with my time...
Should I really pursue the Professional organizing gig?
I have to admit, i'm in that season.
All questions that arise continually.
(I'll share tomorrow on the professional organizer bit).
I am in the final weeks of my 2nd Beth Moore session of the book of James, "Mercy Triumphs'.
The impact that this study has hit me to the core.
This morning I was in a home study with the gals and we were watching the video, and I'm clued in to what Beth was saying on screen and how it cupples over to my own life.
My challenges are daily.
Much like alot of us, right?
I share that every day is not the same for me in my walk with our lord, is it for you?
I walk in faith not sight, (and there's no pun intended as I have only vision in one eye) but each day it's not a cake walk but a faith walk.
Really it is.
And I'm going to keep being in this space till I hand over what I haven't handed over.
It's super difficult.
Yesterday was one of those days.
I won't expound on the details and bore you, but what I will say is God called me out today.
He used Beth Moore via video to tell me.
The biggest take away today for me, and why didn't I hear this when I did this class before was, "Your God has not Forgot you".
It's super easy to worry about where will gas money come from.
How will I buy the fruit and veggies for my food plan.
I then peel another layer away and start to wonder, do family and friends think I'm being lazy for not getting a job.
Do they think I'm trying to mooch off of the kindness of their genorosity?
These are lies that Satan wants to feed me.
Then feed my head with them.
All I know is that...
I don't need to worry.
It's already taken care of in advance.
I just need to let GOD supernaturally take care of it.
Whatever 'it' is at the time.
I know this blog at times is filled with my walk as a widow.
And how challenging the past five years have been.
With snippets of how my walk as Christ daughter as my identity have evolved.
Its the transformation of me from no longer a wife raising a child, but a single woman raising a child with the faith that "Be still and know I am GOD" Hebrews 46:10.
No longer carrying the identity of my corporate america days, but who am I in Christ.
As I absorb the Hebrews scripture, I settle in on it, and I do Think about it.
Think about it alot....
GOD is saying don't do a thing, give it all over to him who is almighty and he will handle it.
He's Soverign.
He's in control.
Not you.
Not I.
I can't keep going on wondering if after all bills are paid, a car payment is made, and my rent and tithing and some food, where will the rest come from?
I need to be still and know GOD will give me what I need, when I need it.
And I just need to let tomorrow take care of itself.
My job for right now, is to keep the faith in the Season that I'm in.
Hugs!
Viola